Friday, 7 November 2008

Hoof Marks Hacked Up All I Had To Offer You Looked All Over This Place

Faff is my favourite British slang word. No, screw that - it's my favourite word. It's very pleasing to say. I love the meaning:

Faff: verb waste time doing nothing
2. to waste time doing stupid things
3. to delay, dilly-dally

Friday Faff is my answer to the comments dilemma. During the week, I will continue to reply to your comments in my comments section. On Friday, I'll reply to questions. I will also write about whatever random things are floating around in my head. Excited? No? Too bad.

Right, so onward to the first installation of Friday Faff:

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Last week Shawn and I made homemade pizza. I used this recipe for the crust, but I used only 1 cup of white flour and substituted whole wheat flour for the rest, I made 2 thin-crust pizzas instead of 1 pizza and I rolled the dough out on cornmeal to add more crunch. For toppings we used: my mom's homemade pizza sauce, capicola, red peppers, tomatoes, caramelized onions (slice onions, melt knob of butter with a splash of olive oil, cook onions on medium heat for 20 - 30 minutes, stirring regularly), artichoke hearts and mozzarella cheese. I added pineapple to mine and Shawn added pepperoni and mushrooms to his. We don't have fancy pizza baking sheets so we just used cookie sheets but the pizza turned out nice and crispy anyway.

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I haven't figured out what to do about the Amazon situation yet. So far my plan of action is to bitch about it on my blog and I've already accomplished that. To everyone who offered to let me ship them to you and you'd forward them to me: Thanks! You rock!

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Your party ideas are fabulous. I love the idea of a trivia game about my mom. I am going to try to pull it together this weekend. Also? I am going to try to convince my sisters that we need jell-o shots. Westy can't be at the party because of hockey (his only break is over Christmas) so we need something there to represent him. Jell-o shots would be perfect. Jell-o shots along with a sign that says "Hooters for Shooters" because Westy is classy like that. True story (see? Friday Faff!): Two summers ago my parents went away for a week and left Westy in charge of their house. Westy threw a massive party. My parents' house is in a cul-de-sac with 6 other houses. When Bow went to check on the house the morning after the party, all of the lawns in the cul-de-sac were strewn with bottles, garbage, vomit, etc. Every single towel in the house (bath towels, hand towels, dish towels, whatever) was on the floor. Bow lifted up one towel and discovered that each towel was covering a pile of vomit. Whenever someone puked, they would cover it with a towel instead of clean it up. It turns out that one of Westy's degenerate friends had bought a crate of tequila from a man in a parking lot. When Bow tried to return the bottles to the liquor store, the liquor store wouldn't accept them because they were not legal alcohol bottles. I'm unclear on what constitutes a legal alcohol bottle but we took it to mean that Westy's friend had bought a crate of home-brewed tequila. Anyway, to wrap up this faffy(!) story, Westy had made a sign that said "Hooters for Shooters" and apparently, judging from the amount of vomit on my parents' floor, it was quite successful. I'm fairly certain that a "Hooters for Shooters" sign would mortify my mother but I still think it would be kind of funny. Someone should probably talk me out of it.

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I am going to the David Usher show tonight with Turtle. I love me some David Usher. So does Turtle, so we might have to fight over him.

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Finally, pictures of Stella hating her birthday sweater.

Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend! I'll be here tomorrow, continuing on my quest to post every day in November. November is almost over, right?


  1. Faff is an awesome word. British slang is so much better than ours, I think. My favourite would have to be bloody or bollocks. Or chuffed. Or wanker. LOL.

    Have fun at the concert!

  2. Bahahaha puppeh in a sweater! That made my week.

    Faff is choice. And I agree with Sharon, even when British people curse in American it manages to sound better... "ewe bahh-sted!"

  3. Stella looks adorable. Those pictures of her make me really want to get another puppy, but I'm not allowed to until we move to a house with a yard. Boo.

  4. That sweater is hilarious. I mean, the sweater is cute. Stella's look is what got me laughing.

  5. So, how does the hooters for shooters go? Like you give them shooters if ... wait. I don't want to know. Just tell us about it next Friday. :-)

  6. I used the word "knackered" on my blog today. Because I usually am.

    I like "faff". Fits me well too.

    If I could, I would give Stella a big hug because she is just too cute!

  7. I heard faff for the first time this summer when I was serving a British couple their dinner. When they explained what it meant, I adopted it!
    But sometimes I forget to use it.

    Love the Shooters for Hooters. I might have to use that sometime.

    Have fun with David!

  8. That's a great word! I haven't actually heard it before, but i'm going to bug the boyfriend about it after work. He's British. He clearly should have told me it previously.

    And Stella looks adorable in that sweater, even if she hates it. :)

  9. faff you!

    and i totally offered to have the stuff shipped to me and then i'd send it to you. but i think my phone ate that comment. STUPID STUPID SMART PHONE SCREW YOU!


  10. I want to buy shady alcohol! not fair!

  11. Um. That is the EXACT SAME dough recipe we used to use...and then I tweaked it like you did. Crazy.

    I just love Stella...

  12. ALMOST 1/2-way there!

    Feedback: For the next Friday Faff, I think you need to write about how Westy and I would make a great, secret internet couple. He's seriously awesome, I'm..interesting and uh, would TOTALLY work. Shut up.

    Stella looks mighty pissy about that sweater. She's all, "Faff this, Mom." But still, I like it :-)

  13. stells looks like she thinks the sweater smells bad, and is trying to keep her face away from it.
    my second favourite britishism is 'i can't be arsed [to do whatever it is i can't be bothered to do]'. i like that they've managed to squeeze a curse into a rather bland comment.
    we are NOT DOING SHOOTERS FOR HOOTERS. i veto it. we can do jello shots though. in westy's team's colours (can we make black jello?). i get that shooters for hooters is funny, but it is her birthday, and we are talking about someone who can't even say the word 'breast' without blushing, unless in regards to chicken.
    and thank you for the birthday concert. i just got out of bed. groan.

  14. "...judging from the amount of vomit on my parents' floor, it was quite successful..."

    Ha! Love it.

    P.S. Your dog looks really smug in that sweater.

  15. Stella is altogether too cute!