First of all, THANK YOU for all your comments and suggestions.
Secondly, umm, please may I have some more suggestions?
Am still itchy.
Since yesterday's post I:
showered in tepid water instead of my usual so-hot-it-burns-your-skin water (this resulted in me being cold and itchy)
tried to explain to the pharmacist why I didn't want to take anti-histamines and could she PLEASE JUST SUGGEST SOMETHING THAT DOES THE SAME THING AS ANTI-HISTAMINES WITHOUT MAKING ME LOOPY (this resulted in me being frustrated and itchy)
barely succeeded in not biting off the pharmacist's head when she said "Oh so you want the maaaaagic pills then?" (this resulted in me being shouty and itchy)
spent another $10 on anti-itch LIES, bringing my grand total to $75 spent on this rash (this resulted in me being broke and itchy)
discovered new rashy bits in the creasy part of my ears (this resulted in me being sad and itchy)
So to summarize: I AM ITCHY.
Just to clarify, pityriasis rosea is kind of like eczema in that it's dry, rashy skin but it's also not like eczema in that it's thought to be caused by a virus whereas eczema is an allergic reaction to something (oh hi, I'm the ideal employee who spent 19 hours on google yesterday instead of working.) So even though I'm slathering on various cremes and lotions and using fragrance-free earth-friendly (so I'm assuming human-friendly) laundry detergent, there's really nothing I can except wait out the rash and try to manage the itchiness.
Oh hey, funny story. Did I tell you how long I would be waiting out the rash? Six to eight weeks. Isn't that a riot? I get to be itchy and disgusting for six to eight weeks! And that's just the average. Pityriasis rosea has been known to last for up to fourteen weeks (it's also been known to last for as few as four weeks but this is my blog and if I want to be bitchy and fatalistic, damn it I will.)
Right. So this is completely unrelated, but does anyone have a nice lemon shortbread recipe they want to share? I want to make lemon shortbread for Christmas but I've never made shortbread before and I'm scared to screw it up. I need a foolproof recipe, please and thanks!