Tuesday, 12 August 2008

I Am Not Your Expectations No No I Am Not My Hair

Okay so I know that I should be posting a wedding recap (a real one, with actual sentences and no bullet points) but there are bigger things afoot, my friends. Now that the wedding is over, I can finally .....


To say that I am excited would be putting it mildly. I am peeing my pants excited.

I emailed Whoorl (do you read her Hair Thursday? You should!) begging to jump the line but no, there are no budgies allowed. She's got enough people lined up for what, like 30 years of Hair Thursday? so here's where you come in. I need you to tell me how to cut my hair. I am useless at hair. These pictures were taken after a trip to my stylist, so this is the best my hair ever looks (and seriously - I can never get it to look like this.) (Please excuse the lack of makeup and weird bandages - these pictures were taken the day after the bachelorette / GHB-fest.)

So. My hair.

My hair is in between straight and wavy. The individual strands are baby fine but I have a tonne of it. My hair is chemically processed and on the dry side of normal.

I want to keep colouring it the same way (which, if you're interested is all-over foils of 1 dark brown and 2 blondes lighter than my natural colour.)

I don't have bangs because I have an obnoxious twisty hair thing happening right in the middle of my forehead. If I have bangs, they require a tonne of work. I am lazy.

I haven't had my hair shorter than shoulder-length for at least five years (it's probably longer than five years but I can't be arsed to figure it out.) I don't want a buzz cut and to be honest, I probably can't handle anything shorter than chin-length, but I am definitely ready for a change.

If I don't make my hair super-straight, I do this:

Both require about 20 minutes of work though, so most days I do this:

(I could not find any pictures of myself with my hair up. I don't know what's wrong with the lighting in this picture but it will have to do because it is seriously the only photo of me wearing a ponytail. I'm so vain.)

The ponytail is my go-to hair. I would like this to change. I want hair that doesn't require a lot of fuss in order to wear it down.

So. Tell me what to do. Send pictures. Don't make me do this on my own or else I will end up in the stylist chair getting 1/2" trimmed off the ends.


  1. I think you should go short. I think you would look great with an A-line haircut, shorter in the back with the longer layers in the front coming down below your chin. Cute and sassy. I have to admit, I am prejudiced though because I just did it a few months ago (spur of the moment with almost no thought about the fact that I cut off 12 IN of hair!) and am in love. I wear it both straight and curly depending on my mood and I it looks great both ways.

  2. How about chopping it up into long layers? I'm partial to waves and curls, and if you did that I imagine it would fall into waves more easily.

    Although I think you could totally pull off a short cut if you decided to do something more drastic.

  3. Anything but that godawful Posh Spice haircut. If I see another one of those, it'll be painful.

    If I had straight hair, I'd go short but that's only because I can't, grass is greener, yada yada yada.

  4. Your hair is gorgeous! What about an assymetrical bob? Longer in front than in back. You could also do this with the longer bits just above your shoulders and the back a little longer (but still shorter than the front). That way, you can still throw it up on the days you can't be bothered.

  5. I am obsessed with short hair. I always like choppy bobs that can be flipped out. They look great with two-toned hair and are fun. Plus they still look great curly.

    I am in the same boat and will seriously chop my hair back off after the wedding. Can't wait!

  6. I also have to say that I think that short hair might suit you well.

    If you don't like it, it will grow back.

  7. i am also useless at hair! i am still waiting for the magic product / haircut / anything that will make my hair not a limp mop. so far, no luck.

  8. im with nilsa! asymmetrical bob! it's all the rage these days, i know i just cut 6 inches off my hair to get one, and i love it!

  9. i cut my hair after i got married, too. are you really sure you want to chop it all off?

    i do NOT recommend layers b/c they are a pain in the ass. absolutely gorgeous, but a giant pain in the ass.

    i LOVE my haircut. i have a severe a-line. i could link you a pic, but the pic is of posh spice and someone said they hate her hair. my hair is longer than chin length (brushes the tops of my shoulders) in the front, and short in the back, like just above the nape of my neck.

    i love posh's hair...but that's just me.

  10. In my experience, layers work wonders for enhancing waves, but drive you crazy when you want to wear your hair straight. If you decide on shorter hair, I think an
    Eva Longoria
    Charlize Theron
    just-below-chin-length bob would be cute. Posh Spice's haircut could be cute, if you're the fashionista type. If you'd rather stay longer, the one Jessica Biel has in this picture seems like it would work for your hair type.

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  12. oh i love your hair, it's so pretty. and definitely don't touch the coloring either, it's gorgeous.

  13. I would cut is as short as you are comfortable with just for the contrast.

  14. Thanks for all the feedback (and compliments! Wow, you guys (and gals) are good for the ego!)

    I have a confession to make ... I do not love the Posh bob. Let me rephrase that: I like it for other people, I do not love it for me. I think that in order to pull it off, one needs super straight hair. My hair is not super straight without involving a blow drier, straightener and assorted hair products. And even then it doesn't stay straight if it rains. It rains every day in Vancouver. True fact.

    Jess: I am SO SURE that I want to chop it off. I was only keeping it long so I could successfully wear it up for the wedding (can't stand fly-y bits of hair in my face.)

  15. Jane: I love the Charlize Theron hair. This is a definite possibility.

  16. Why don't you start with cutting off 3ish inches first, and if you still want more go shorter. i think short hair would look good on you, but wavy hair is scary when you cut it. I have curly/wavy hair and I cut it short once... it was insane.

  17. As one with hair THE EXACT OPPOSITE of yours, I have no advice.

    I would be sad to lose the pony tail though...

  18. just don't get bangs. For the love of all that is holy and good in this world AVOID BANGS!!!

  19. i did the same thing after I got married - I went with the Katie Holmes bob and have to say, I've never gotten more compliments in my life. Similar to what Nilsa suggested - I love it. BUT - I will warn you of this...short hair is WAY more work than long hair. No throwing it up...and it doesn't look good for as many days in a row without washing (with my dry hair I try to go at least 2 or 3)...but it's lots of fun to do something new.

  20. I think you should get a perm. And make sure to brush it out daily. With like a horse-hair brush. And don't use any product. Oh, and cut bangs and get those permed, too. I'm pretty sure that would be totally rad. (Tell Shawn my address so he can send me a thank-you note.)

    In all seriousness, I'm going to have to think on this. As of right now, I think it would be cool if you got a slightly-shorter than shoulder-length bob, all one length, except get the ends textured. It's a cut that looks great scrunched or flat-ironed. Also, it's still behind-the-ears-tuckable.

    That said, your long hair looks awesome and hello?? Where did you get those shoulders?? Pick them up at the "gun" club? Shit, Hills...I'll feel safe with you at blogHer. If anyone attacks us, you can ram them in the chin with your shoulders of steel and I'll slap them senseless with my Oprah arms.

    (Sorry for the mini-post)

  21. i'm telling you, i just chopped off all my hair and i love it. apparently the super blunt cut and just above the shoulders is in right now... who knew.

    but i can still pull it back and it takes HALF the time to dry and style. it's blissful really.

    it won't be too drastic of a change that you are in hair withdrawal, but it will be a nice change that will make your hair feel soooo healthy!