Tuesday 16 March 2010

So I Hid My Soiled Hands Behind My Back Somewhere Along The line I Must've Gone Off Track With You

In the last few days I have been an inconsiderate ass both on and off the internet. It makes my heart ache to know that I have caused hurt feelings or bruised egos or frustration. Knowing that someone I care about is vexed because of me makes me want to shrivel up and hide in a dark hole. It doesn't matter that my intent was in no way malicious, I am still angry at myself for my thoughtless blunders. It's silly; I carry around the guilt and negativity long after I've apologized and been forgiven. It's neither healthy nor productive yet here I am, feeling sad and blue and worthless.

* * *

This morning Shawn was driving on the highway behind a garbage truck when a large piece of metal flew out of the back of the truck and hit our car. Shawn is okay (which is all that matters in this situation) but our car is not. Literally last night we had a discussion about how money is a bit tight this month due to vet bills and our upcoming property tax bill.

* * *

Today is not a good day but I can't help but smile when I watch this video. I don't know much about Chatroulette and I'm not interested in finding out more (I feel like there is probably a lot of naked man junk floating around) but it makes me happy that there are people like Merton out there making the world a funnier place.

16 comments:

  1. John Stewart did a whole bit on his show about Chatroulette and the amount of man junk on it. It was quite amusing.

    I do the same thing re: self bashing and it totally blows. Sorry hon.

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  2. I love that chatroulette video!! I actually laughed out loud. It takes a lot to make me do that these days. :)

    Sorry to hear about the car suckage, but glad that Shawn's okay.

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  3. There are plenty of situations in our lives where we need to vent. Sometimes we need to have a heart-to-heart with the person causing our grief. And other times, we just need to get it off our chest to let the Universe deal with it on our behalf. Personally, I think each situation warrants a different response. And I think you deserve to have a place (whether *here* or elsewhere) where you can vent. Because the alternative of holding it in ... that's not healthy either.

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  4. Paragraph 1: Ditto

    Paragraph 2: That blows, dude. But glad Shawn's OK.

    Paragraph 3: I don't have sound at work but will check it later.

    Feel better today, babe.

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  5. Sorry hunny bunny. I am glad Shawn is OK, and I hope things turn around fast!

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  6. Also, I hope you don't mind that I called you hunny bunny. And deliberately spelled it hunny.

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  7. Thanks for the video - I needed something to make me smile today.

    Also, I'm glad Shawn is OK. Did he get the driver's info?

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  8. Oh I'm sorry that you're feeling badly about an exchange with a friend! I hate it when that happens, it makes my skin crawl- hopefully just letting some time pass will help. I'm thinking about you! =)

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  9. Oh I'm sorry that you're feeling badly about an exchange with a friend! I hate it when that happens, it makes my skin crawl- hopefully just letting some time pass will help. I'm thinking about you! =)

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  10. Oh I'm sorry that you're feeling badly about an exchange with a friend! I hate it when that happens, it makes my skin crawl- hopefully just letting some time pass will help. I'm thinking about you! =)

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  11. I'm so sorry you've had a rough few days, babe.

    Also: I should tell you that I am sitting here unable to stop laughing at that video. FIREFLIES. He plays FIREFLIES. And then, the very last guy, where Merton just starts laughing? SO GREAT. In short: I'm sort of in love with that video right now, so thank you.

    I hope tomorrow is better.

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  12. I'm sorry you've had a rough couple of days, but let me put you straight - you have been the most CONSIDERATE person in my life the last few days and taking the time to send someone a little card when they were going through something tough speaks volumes about how wonderful (and non-assy) you are. :)

    I'm so glad Shawn is okay, and I hope things pick up for you soon - I feel guilty and sad too long after apologies etc., it's the one thing I wish I could work on some more but it seems like somehow that's just how I was wired - sending good and positive vibes your way! xx

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  13. i am having difficulties imagining you as an inconsiderate ass. does not compute :-)

    HOLY COW did i love that video. it alllllmost makes me want to try chatroulette. not enough to actually TRY it though, i'm pretty sure.

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  14. That video was great! Thanks for sharing! :)

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  15. p.s. Good luck with your first dilemma ... I totally know what you mean. I am the worst at letting go of things.

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  16. Did I miss the post when you were the inconsiderate arse? Because I'd like to read that one.

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