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I broke a board last night. With my force. First, though, I punched it and it did not break. Then I cried because, holy fuck do you know how much it hurts to punch a board as hard as you can? A lot. I ended up breaking it with an axe kick. Yeah, I do stuff like axe kicks. I'm pretty much the badassest (totally a word - don't question me, I will axe kick you) blogger around.
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I bought my turkey a few nights ago. I couldn't find a fresh turkey so I had to buy a frozen one. I suspect that I couldn't find a fresh one because I refused to go to the butcher shop (so expensive! so ... meaty!) I moved the turkey from the freezer to the fridge today to start defrosting but I ran into a bit of a dilemma ... do you unwrap the turkey to defrost it? It's in some sort of turkey condom right now, which I like because it's keeping all the scary turkey germs from flying around the inside of my fridge, but I'm afraid that if I don't unwrap it I will end up with a still-frozen turkey on Sunday morning when I go to cook it. Suggestions? Advice? Offers to come cook my turkey? All welcome!
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I am having laser eye surgery in 11 days. I booked it months ago but I didn't blog about it because I was fairly certain that I would back out like the giant scaredy pants that I am. I'm past the point of being able to get my $400 deposit back, though, so I need to tell as many people about the surgery as possible so I will feel like a wiener if I back out. Dudes, if I do not blog about my successful laser eye surgery on December 29th, I fully expect you all to call me names and put me in the shame corner.
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Georgia is a fucking rockstar. Head over to her blog today and give her a high five, please and thanks!
I think you can leave the turkey in the package.
ReplyDeleteI've known some people with great experiences with that surgery and some with really not good experiences. Good luck!
Don't wuss out - I got my eyes done about 2 years ago & it's the best thing ever. It's not exactly fun during the surgery, but they give you a Valium for that reason.
ReplyDeleteI also think that you defrost the turkey in its wrapper.
Keep it wrapped. And if you have a bathtub, put it in a cool bath over night the night before the dinner.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the board breaking, you're so huge and tough!!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with laser eye surgery, I know a lot of people who have had it & really benefited from it, and they have no scary stories to tell =)
1. Leave the turkey in the package.
ReplyDelete2. YAY for laser surgery. I know we've already talked about it, but dude. SO AWESOME.
ooh yay for laser surgery, that's awesome!
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh!! I've been wanting to get laser eye surgery for years and I've always been way too much of a wuss to actually do it. I'll be sending good vibes your way!
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm sorry, but "some sort of turkey condom" was pretty much the best thing I read all day :)
Yay for the board break! That's wicked!
ReplyDeleteI agree - keep that turkey wrapped up :)
I want to do laser eye surgery so badly but I'm poor and scared. Please let me know how it goes!
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure you want to leave the turkey condom on. Otherwise, the turkey can spread his seed and that would be a very bad thing.
ReplyDeleteAlso, congrats on breaking a board without a saw. I'm way impressed!
Dude, that is so cool. I wish I was getting laser eyes. Can you, like, see through clothing with them or burn shit or what? Blue or red beams?
ReplyDeleteDefinitely do the eye surgery! I've heard NOTHING but great things. I really don't think it's risky anymore- maybe a decade ago, but not now!
ReplyDeleteLaser eye surgery is great! but may I suggest NOT doing much close work ie. reading, blogging or such or it might not last many years mine last five years and started to go bad again.
ReplyDeleteHigh five to the board breaking (and please to teach me)!
ReplyDeleteLeave the turkey in the package.
And you better go for the laser eye surgery young lady! I'll hold you to it. Or try my best.