Thursday 10 December 2009

And I Get What I Want My Name Is My Credit Card Don't Try To Hate Me Because I Am So Popular

I was not one of the sparkly popular kids in school. My family didn't have a lot of money; I wore my sister's hand-me-down clothes; my parents drove a 15-year-old station wagon (with imitation wood panelling!); we lived in a neighbourhood of families who took annual vacations to places like Palm Springs and Hawaii. It wasn't just my family's financial situation that made me an easy target, though. I was quiet; I got good grades in school; teachers liked me because I did my homework and didn't create any problems. I was a nerd, is what I'm saying. I was a nerd without trendy clothes or exotic vacation stories. I was a nerd before being a nerd was cool. Most of the time I was able to stay under the radar of the beautiful people but occasionally one of the Wretched would take notice of me and make my life miserable. It made me a little mistrustful of the beautiful people. The anxiety doesn't help, of course, but I'm fairly certain that the root of my social awkwardness can be traced back to my angst-ridden days in elementary school. I live my life stumbling from one awkward encounter to the next, relying on my core group of people to provide my comfort zone.

And then a night like tonight happens. Kyla Roma came to Vancouver and asked if I wanted to meet. Kyla Roma is one of the sparkly popular kids of my bloggy world. Her writing is honest and beautiful. Her soul shines through her words. She ... scares me. Seriously. I was excited to meet her but also anxious. Tummy-clenching, speak-too-quickly, forget-to-breathe anxious. Which is silly because obviously she was lovely and sweet and I had a fabulous time. We drank winter ale and ate yam fries and talked about blogging and this may just be the 9% beer talking but I feel like tonight I managed to be kinda sorta un-awkward (Kyla, if you don't agree, please be a darling and pretend that you do!) Nights like tonight make me feel like maybe I can do blogger meet-ups without dying inside. Not anytime soon, mind you, but I'm getting there. Baby steps, people. Baby steps.

16 comments:

  1. You are also one of the sparkly popular kids of blogging. Your combined sparkly popularness must have been ridiculous in person.

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  2. Seconded! I'd be totally awkward and nervous if I ever had the chance to meet *you*, one of the sparkliest, loveliest kids of blogging I know!

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  3. This is when I love the Internet - when it brings people together in sparkly loveliness.

    (When I don't love the internet = when coworkers find my blog.)

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  4. I was an awkward nerd in school too. Such is life :) I think you're sparkly too. :)

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  5. GAHHHH Kyla was in Vancouver? This is where I wish that she even knew who I was. I may have commented on her site once or twice but, yeah. Glad it was a blast!

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  6. You're pretty sparkly yourself, lady.

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  7. You are beautiful and sparkly and so damn smart and funny on top of it.

    But that kid stuff never completely goes away, does it?

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  8. Most people you will meet from the blog world become even more interesting in the real world. I'm sure you are too.

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  9. You underestimate your sparkly powers. Maybe they bloomed a little later than most, but I promise you, they're there.

    So glad my two favorite Canadian bloggers got to meet!

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  10. I love meeting Internet People! You never know what sort of awesomeness might come of it (like, when someone you meet ends up being a member of your wedding party a couple of years later).

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  11. You and Kyla are both sparkley popular girls in blogging world. Just thinking of meeting up makes my tummy clench. Glad you two got to combine your sparkley powers (as Ben said) and take over Gastown for an eve.

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  12. ben took the words right out of my mouth. you are both so sparkly and super and wonderous it's no surprise you had a fabulous night.

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  13. LOL aww. I was the same child. Completely.

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  14. You are one of the shiny sparkly people in my world - blogging and real - and it was so much fun to hang out with you! I was so sleep deprived, so running on empty that I'm sure the reason you felt more comfortable was that I took on ALL of the awkward on my sleepy shoulders!

    I will send you an e-mail shortly when I can muster up the coherence, I would have loved to come hang out with you another night! But I hope that where you guys went ended up being higher quality than the sticky carpet bar you told me about.

    Although if you ended up bouncing again, I would get behind that =)

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  15. I'm probably reiterating what everyone else has been saying but you are AWESOME! Don't underestimate yourself lady!

    Soooooo, when will you come and visit DC? :)

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  16. I'm sure that together, you and Kyla had that place sparkling more than a couple of kindergarteners with access to glitter.

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