I Died Eating French Fries In The Restaurant On The Corner

Friday Faff: Employment is Exciting! Edition

Let's get the important business out of the way first, shall we? A few of you expressed interest in poutine. As it turns out, I talk about poutine a lot. There were like five more poutine posts I could link to but I'm lazy.

Anyway, Adriana: yes, poutine is different in Vancouver than it is in Montreal. Poutine is a French-Canadian delicacy so Montreal poutine is authentic poutine. That being said, I have had good poutine in Vancouver that was better than bad poutine in Montreal, if that makes sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is, if given the opportunity to try poutine, don't turn it down because of one bad poutine experience. You could miss out on an amazing poutine experience.

Tia: If you make it to BC, go here. Fritz = amazing poutine.

Lisa: It makes me so sad that you only recently learned of poutine. I hope that you make up for lost time and track down some poutine pronto.

Maxie: If I ever make to any of the meet-ups, I will bring you some poutine. It will probably be cold and congealed but hey, you'll be drunk so you won't even notice.

Julienne: It's not real poutine if it uses mozzarella instead of cheese curds!

Stella would like some poutine, please.

I lied. The poutine isn't the most important business. Thanking all of you rockstars is the important business. Thank you all for your kind comments. It was a tough week and opening up my email to find a plethora of support from you lot was amazing. Thanks, dudes!

Shawn and the puppies say thanks too!

Shawn's interview went really well and he was offered the job. He's hesitant to take it because it is a significant pay cut but I keep reminding him that less dollars is better than no dollars. A pay cut isn't the end of the world. He's still bed-ridden with the flu so he doesn't need to make a decision right now. He's going to think about it this weekend and make a decision on Monday.

There is a lot of thinking to be done.

His decision will impact my decision whether or not to pursue my job opportunity any further. This new job will mean a lot less stress (I cannot emphasize the stress enough - on a scale from 1 to 10, where 10 = STRESS!, my current job is a 9. If I'm reading the situation correctly, this new job would be somewhere around a 2 or 3.) It will also mean a much shorter commute. Unfortunately, it would also mean a pay cut. I'm not sure that I'm comfortable taking a pay cut at the same time as Shawn.

And now, a puppy question. How do you prevent your puppies from going under your bed? Our bed is very low to the ground but Stella still manages to squeeze herself under it to get at Wolfgang. We've tried blocking it off with various objects but the puppies are evil and chew their way through. I don't want Stella to be under the bed because she's got carpet burn on her belly that is turning into a unhealable wound. She keeps ripping off the healed bits and reopening the burny bits and it is just as disgusting as it sounds. Any suggestions?

See? She is too big to be under there! Nutty dog.

Famous Homemade Chicken Soup, Can I Have Another Bowl?

Shawn made it to his interview yesterday and then came home and collapsed into bed. I found him there when I got home hours later, curled up in his now-rumpled Interview Clothes. Interview Clothes that I had ironed the night before because that is what you do when you love someone, you iron their dress shirts and pants so they don't look homeless when they go on a job interview. It had nothing to do with the fact that I actually enjoy ironing (let's just keep that our little secret, shall we? I don't want Shawn finding out that I don't mind doing the one chore that he hates with a passion and promises endless backrubs and chocolate in order to get out of doing.)

Shawn has had an impressive array of Man Colds in the time I've known him (no really, click that link - you will pee your pants) but I've never seen him sick sick. He's got a fever that's actually backed by the thermometer and he's been acting a bit loopy. For example, earlier I was talking to Turtle about our little sister (the judgey one) and Shawn piped up that her name is the Hawaiian word for banshee. And then he giggled uncontrollably.  So yes, Shawn is sick. Sicker than I realized at 4am when I may or may not have told him to man up and let me sleep. 

In an effort to alleviate my guilt and prove that I do have the capacity to be sympathetic (just not at 4am!) I made Shawn some homemade chicken soup. It's surprisingly easy to make and it serves its purpose well - the person who makes the soup gets to feel like a rockstar and the person who eats the soup gets to feel loved. 

Put 4 cups cold water and 4 cups chicken stock in a large pot over medium-high heat. Chop up 2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts into smallish chunks and add to broth (I usually add the chicken to the broth before I turn the heat on to ensure that the chicken is cooking for the longest amount of time possible but I'm pretty crazy when it comes to cooking chicken. I consistently overcook my chicken because of my irrational fear of germs.) As the broth heats up, chop and add the following: 1 purple onion, diced finely. 2 carrots, chopped. 3 stalks celery, chopped. About an inch of fresh ginger root, grated (minced? I don't know what it's called.) Let the mixture come to a boil. When it's boiling rapidly, add about a cup and a half of uncooked egg noodles, about a cup of frozen pees and a few teaspoons of dried parsley flakes. Bring to a boil again, cover, reduce heat and simmer for about 15 minutes (or until noodles are cooked through and you're convinced the chicken is done.) For maximum brownie points, serve with crackers & cheese and lemon tea. 

And because I have no idea how to end this post: a picture of the puppies each chewing a bone instead of chewing each other. I call this picture Progress (even though you can totally tell from Stella's facial expression that she'd much rather be chowing down on Wolfgang's ear.) 

And Neither Will I Take It From Snappy Young Brats

Shawn and I are making a huge effort to be especially gentle with each other right now. We're both stressed about our individual job situations and what it means for us as a couple. We're both making an effort to be supportive and encouraging and just nice to each other. Except that sometimes, at 4am, when you're shaken awake from a deep sleep so that your husband can tell you that he feels sick, it's difficult to remember to be nice. Sometimes you might respond with a snappy "sssshhhhhh!" and a disgruntled sigh. You might even ask your husband if he could perhaps shiver less violently, as you're trying to sleep.

In my defence, I don't think I was actually awake because I don't remember any of it at all. Shawn told me the story this morning, with puppy dog eyes and a gravelly voice. He's got a fever and chills and a sore throat (and a job interview! today!) and oh, aren't I the best wife in the world? If I ever have kids, I will totally be the mom who's all "Gawd. Can't you change your own diaper? I have important things to do like reading blogs and eating chocolate."

Sigh.

So I made him some lemon tea and made myself a bit late for work but I think it was worth it because he just texted me to let me know that he's on his way to his interview (my lemon tea is magical.) I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he doesn't vomit on anyone.

Fine Place For A Day Full Of Breakdowns Takes More Than A Meltdown To Show Us How

I'm not sure if I need to point this out, but stress management? Is not one of my strengths.

The past two weeks have been stressful to say the least. Shawn's job (which we thought was secure) started to get a bit dodgy. Last Friday, after a week and a half of uncertainty, Shawn lost his job. Partly because of the economy and partly because of his shady boss but whatever the reason, the outcome remains the same - Shawn is officially unemployed.

The plan has always been that he would one day start his own business. We thought that maybe this was an opportunity (a sign? a kick in the pants?) to start the ball rolling. We threw around a few ideas - moving to Kelowna to start the business in a city with less competition, selling our condo and moving back into downtown Vancouver to be right in the thick of things - but in the end we decided to stay put. Shawn is an audio video designer; he designs elaborate entertainment systems and sells the equipment required to complete them. He deals in luxury goods. Luxury is the devil right now. People can't get far enough away from luxury. So plans for Shawn's business have been put on hold and his job search has begun.

Shawn's unemployment + me being absolutely convinced that I was pregnant = a Very Stressful Time for us. Fortunately, my womb is blissfully empty (Tia, I am choosing to ignore you and your "false negative" warning) and Shawn has a job interview lined up for tomorrow. He's lucky that he has a lot of contacts in the industry and managed to finagle a job interview for a position that he knows is unfilled. If offered this job, he will be taking a 20% pay decrease from his last position, which sucks but isn't the end of the world.

Which brings me to yesterday and my meltdown.

Yesterday I had a job interview.

And that is pretty much all I can say about that. I wish I could say more because my brain is bursting, but I can't. I'm kind of peeing my pants right now, but in a good way. The bad stress has turned to good stress all of a sudden and I think I can return to my regularly scheduled program of lentils and vegetables for lunch instead of licorice and cookies.

Shawn and I went to our favourite restaurant last night and ate burgers and poutine (sober poutine is almost as good as drunken poutine - who knew?) and talked about everything that's happening right now. We don't have a game plan but we have a few ideas. It feels good to know that we're in this thing together, that even if I stay at my soul-sucking job, at the end of each day I get to come home to an amazing man and two insane yet adorable puppies and we'll make it work somehow. I feel so lucky and optimistic that this is all going to work out. That's not to say that there won't be more crying or head-melting, I mean I am who I am and let's face it - I may not have stress management skills but when it comes to overreacting and dramatizing even the smallest situation? I'm your gal. Stay tuned for more crazy ...

Distracted By Irrelevance The Stress And The Tension

Big things are happening right now. Big, stressful things that I can't really talk about right now.

Oh, and before anyone asks, no I am not pregnant. Just because I am a newlywed doesn't mean that I'm gagging to procreate. (Except that, um, last week I thought I might be pregnant. And that was contributing to the Big! Stressful! things. But it's okay, Saturday morning I peed on a stick and three horrible minutes later, Shawn and I high-fived enthusiastically and repeatedly when only one line showed up instead of two.)

So, right. Big stressful (non-pregnancy related) things are happening.

I knew that I was stressed (the headaches and stomachaches and the completely bizarre cryings jags tipped me off. What constitutes a completely bizarre crying jag? Crying because your puppy has toenails. The toenails didn't scratch me, or Stella, or anything else. It wasn't because I had to cut the toenails (though that does suck.) The crying was due to the fact that Wolfgang is a skinny puppy. No matter what we do, he stays skinny. We increased his food intake. We put him on a high-protein food. We feed him treats like nobody's business. And yet, he is rail-thin. But his toenails! They don't stop growing! His toenails grow freakishly fast. And this is what the crying was about - I feel like all the effort we put into making Wolfgang gain weight is directly related to how fast his toenails grow. Like the extra protein in the high-protein puppy food is making him grow monster claws instead of a round puppy belly. And so, the crying.)

Anyway.

I didn't realize how stressed I was until just now. I went out to grab lunch and ended up in the drugstore. I was on my cell with Shawn so I wasn't really paying attention to what I was buying - I just went up the food aisle and threw a few things in my basket, paid, and left. I just got back to the office and opened my bag to see what I bought. I give you, my lunch:

1 bag pretzels
1 package of licorice
1 package of those yummy cream cookies with the red jelly centre
1 bag roasted, salted almonds
1 Skor bar
1 Coke

Yes, I'll take my stress with a side of diabetes and high blood pressure, please.

I have a Big! Stressful! potentially life-changing meeting in one hour and if I eat this lunch, I will die. I'm thinking I should eat the almonds for the protein and drink the Coke for its sweet, glorious caffeine and leave the rest. There's a pot of yogurt in the fridge that I can steal (and replace tomorrow - I know my office etiquette) and I think that will tide me over until I grab some real food. The problem is that when I'm stressed, I crave sugary foods (clearly.) The candy is calling my name. I can't resist!

I Can Be Your Hero Baby

Friday Faff: Super Hero Edition

Because if this isn't faffy, I don't know what is.

Birthday Boy So Afraid Plays The Machines In The Arcade

Dear Westy,

If I were a mean older sister, I might talk about how when you were really young we used to dress you up in dresses and call you Natalie. I might post pictures of the mullet you sported from the age of two until you were about seven (seven! much too old to think that mullets are cool!) I would probably even tell the story of the time you cut your bangs off (completely off - you just had a sad little tuft at the top of your forehead) with Dad's mustache scissors and then finished your look by dumping a bottle of Mom's eau de toilette on your head.

It's a good thing I'm not a mean older sister.

Happy 21st birthday, Westy!

Just A Perfect Day Problems All Left Alone Weekenders On Our Own Such Fun

This past weekend was so fun, so heartmeltingly perfect, that I almost don't want another weekend ever because there is no way it could live up to the weekend I just experienced. That's just crazy talk though because really, what's worse - a bad weekend or a perfect work week? I'll take the bad weekend every time.

Friday night started with three of my favourite ladies coming over for a food & Wii party. We started the night eating copious amounts of food (see below) and then worked off our cheese-babies on the Wii Fit. I have not laughed so hard in a long time.

Saturday morning I woke up and could barely move, my abs were so sore. Damn you Wii Fit Hula Hoop! A dear friend was in town for the weekend so I took her out for Valentine's / Birthday pancakes. I also managed to convince her that she should let me throw her a baby shower (whoohoo, party planning here I come!)

My Saturday afternoon was a lazy one (which Shawn managed to catch on camera.)

Saturday night was Shawn's album release party at the Railway Club. The show went really well - the bar was packed and Shawn played really well (and looked damn fine while doing so.)

He had to stay until the last band finished so I hopped on the train by myself to head home when I got tired. And promptly realized that taking the train during rush hour is nothing like taking the train at 1am. I think the problem was that I had only had a few drinks at the bar so all the really drunk people were just annoying and loud. Or I'm just getting old.

The weather on Sunday was fabulous - blue skies and sunshine and almost warm. I took the pups to the dog park while Shawn recovered from his late night (he didn't get home until after 4am.) (And he is getting old.) And then we came home and the puppies got in trouble while I made yummy omelettes for brunch.

Stella loves shoes. She is always trying to get into the closet so she can get at the shoes. She's trying to teach Wolfgang her wicked ways.


Sunday night was spent watching the Canucks destroy the Habs and eating chicken satay with peanut sauce (which is now officially my favourite food.) My perfect weekend was not finished yet, though, because after the Canucks games I watched the season premier of The Amazing Race. I love this show. I love Phil Keoghan. I love everything about it. This weekend recap is long enough so instead of babbling about how awesome the first episode was, I'll just say that I'm happy with the couple who was eliminated (they were Annoying with a capital A) and my favourite couples as of right now are Brad & Victoria and Mel & Mike. I would like Linda & Steve to be eliminated next because I don't find it particularly entertaining to watch a man berate his wife for not being able to run fast enough. Can't wait for next week's episode!

Inland From Vancouver Shore The Ravens And The Seagulls Push Each Other Inward And Outward

Friday Faff: Soapbox Edition

One of items in my 25 Things About Me post was that I don't support the 2010 Vancouver Olympics. Sarah asked why. I composed a long, ranty post in my head but decided to try to break it down into brief sections. There will be less head melting that way.

Shame
Vancouver has more homeless people than any other Canadian city. Part of the reason is due to the fact that you can sleep on the street in Vancouver in the dead of winter and wake up alive. I'm not sure that applies anywhere else in Canada. If Vancouver has billions of dollars to swing its Olympic-sized dick around, surely they can find a few million to build housing for Vancouver's homeless.

Manipulation
If I was creating a budget for an event that is occurring in the future, I would ensure to factor in a reasonable rate of inflation. Stating that Vancouver's Olympic security budget jumped from $175 million to over a billion dollars because of inflation is manipulative and insulting.

Legacy
Just last year, Montreal finally paid off its debt from the 1976 Olympics. I am afraid that Vancouver is following the same path, especially after the City of Vancouver's $100 million loan guarantee to the company building the Olympic Village.

I love my city. Vancouver is beautiful and vibrant and alive. I understand why people support the Olympics. I understand that people want to show off this amazing city to the world. I just don't feel like it should come at a cost to Vancouver's most vulnerable residents. Vancouver belongs to everyone - not just the rich yuppies who can actually afford tickets to the games.

/end rant

That's All I've Ever Been 'Cause You Don't Know Me

The fantastically hip (I've decided to stop using the term "lovely" because I use it approximately 8000 times a day, so I'm bringing back "hip" - spread the, uh, word. Ha!) Angella sent me the following questions so I could participate in the getting to know you business that is floating around the internet.

1. You were only the second wedding I had ever shot. Were you nervous that I would not be able to capture your day (BE HONEST)?

Honestly? No. I was not worried at all. Being a long-time reader of your blog, I already had a sense of your photography style. Shawn and I agreed that we wanted our wedding photos to look more like candid shots rather than traditionally-posed photographs. Also, judging from your online personality, I felt like you would be extremely conscious of making sure everything was perfect. I was counting on you being over-prepared because of your rookie status :) And you totally delivered! I love the crazy, funny shots (um, I got to pose on a police motorcycle in my wedding dress. Best wedding photo ever!) and I appreciate the more traditional family shots. You captured our day perfectly.

2. You now have two (adorable) dogs. Are you done at two, or do you want more?

First of all, thanks! I think they're adorable too and I take full credit for their adorableness.

As you can see, it's hard work being so adorable.

They are often tired out from being so adorable.

For now, we are done. We live in a 700 sq.ft. condo and it feels Very Full sometimes. If we can ever afford a house, I'd love to add a third dog to the mix. I'm pretty sure I could persuade Shawn to get another dog if it was a boxer but for now we're pretty happy with the two we have.

Stella would like it noted that she does not approve.


3. I honestly have no idea what you do for a living, but do you like it? If not, what is your dream career?

This is a really difficult question to answer. There are some pretty serious pros and cons to my job. One of the perks is that I sit in front of a computer all day and as such, I read a ridiculous amount of blogs. One thing that isn't so cool about my job is that it can be pretty soul-crushing to work in a male-dominated field doing administration (my job description can pretty much be summed up with the phrase "office bitch.")

My dream is to be a food writer / restaurant reviewer. Getting paid to eat and then talk about it? Now there's a job I could love.

4. I know that you traveled to Europe; where else in the world would you travel to if money were not an issue?

It's impossible for me to choose one place! I'd start by heading to London, Ontario so Shawn could see his friends (Shawn moved to Vancouver six years ago and sometimes I worry that one day he'll want to move back to Ontario. I do not love cold weather and I think I would die in Ontario.) Then we'd head to London, England so I could see my peeps. From England we'd go to Aberdeen to visit Trish & Cory (the last time I saw them they were a family of two - now they're a family of four!) From Scotland we'd zip over to Northern Ireland to see the Giant's Causeway (we've both always wanted to see it.) If we weren't homesick for the puppies yet, we'd travel to Iceland and then to Cuba for some relaxation on the beach.

5. Why do you blog and what got you started? (I always love to hear people's stories on this)

I had no idea what a blog was until Cory (I used to work with him a million years ago) showed me his wife's blog. I read it for a while before discovering the links (Angella, yours was the second blog I ever read!) I lurked on various blogs for a long time before starting my own (I missed my first blogiversary but it was back in November if anyone cares.) I blog because it's an outlet for me. I worry a lot and I think a lot. If I don't write, my thoughts and concerns swirl around my brain and the crazy takes over and it makes me a very difficult person to live with.

So! If you would like to join in on the interviewing party, follow these directions:

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me”.
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

I Wanna See You Out That Door Baby Bye Bye Bye

Dear Pityriasis Rosea:

You have been an unwanted part of my life since early November. For the last three months you have made me feel depressed, self-conscious, and itchy. I tried everything I could think of to make you go away. You are a stubborn bastard.

I'm happy to report that as of this morning, you have been reduced to three small spots on my back, one on my arm, and one in my knee-pit. I estimate that you are 95% gone now and I cannot express the joy I feel. I hope to never see you again.

Love,
The One Who No Longer Wants To Rip Her Own Skin Off


Dear Photo Printing Company that Starts with a K and Ends with an Odak:

When you bought out the company that I was using for printing my photos, you assured me that you would fulfill my photo printings needs. You threw around words like "easy" and "seamless" and phrases like "award winning print quality" and "satisfaction guaranteed." I trusted you, Photo Printing Company that Starts with a K and Ends with an Odak. Clearly, I should have made you work harder to earn my trust.

Back in November, I ordered three calendars from you. We made three different calendars because Shawn's parents do not want calendars that include pictures of each other and my parents would rather have a calendar that included pictures of my siblings rather than pictures of Shawn's brother. It's not a complicated process at all; we made our three different calendars and I placed the order.

And then my order arrived and not only did I have three copies of Shawn's mom's calendar (and no copies of Shawn's dad's or my parents' calendars,) the quality was horrible. Despite the editing I had done through your program, the red-eye was not corrected in any of the photos. Also, there was random spots on some of the pages. I was extremely upset until I went online to check out your return policy. Whereupon I was pleasantly surprised to find that you have a 30-day unrestricted return policy. Which got me thinking ... how crappy must you be if you give your customers 30 days to return completely personalized, non-reusable product for a full refund?

Anyway, I printed off the handy, free-shipping label (remember the label - the label is important) and mailed the calendars back to you for my full refund. That was at the end of November. You told me that it could take up to four weeks to process my return so I didn't worry when my December credit card statement came and there was no credit on it. I did start to worry when there was no credit on my January statement so I emailed you to check on the progress of my return. You told me that my return had not been received yet. This was a bit worrying as I'd mailed it over six weeks before. Before I could work myself into a lather, I received an email saying that my return had been received and you would start the process of getting me my money.

This morning I got an email saying that you had submitted a credit of $42 to my credit card company and that it should show on my next statement. Here's where things get a bit fuzzy. The calendars were $19.99 each. I ordered three, which brings me up to $59.97 - I had a 30% coupon though, so my total was $41.98 plus tax. With tax, I paid $47.02. I don't know where the magical number 42 came from but I am assuming that you processed a return for three $20 calendars with a 30% discount and no tax. Which brings me to the conclusion that you live in a magical tax-free world.

I emailed you to ask why I was not receiving a refund for the GST & PST and you sent a rather snippy reply that shipping costs can not be refunded when third-party shipping is used. You then offered to send me a credit for free shipping, should I ever need to return something to you again. And then my head melted. First of all, my email had nothing to do with shipping. Secondly, are you really offering to send me a shipping credit when I already know that shipping is free (remember the free-shipping label)? Lastly, are you implying that if I order from you again, you're going to eff it up and I'll need to return my order?

I sent an email back to you asking you to try again.

It has been over two months since I returned the calendars to you, Photo Printing Company that Starts with a K and Ends with an Odak, but I am happy to report that I finally received my credit (for the full amount! With GST & PST!) today. Thank you for finally coming through. I think that we may need some time apart, though. I don't trust you anymore. The quality of your product is lacking and your customer service is dismal. I think we need to see other people. No hard feelings, m'kay?

From,
The One Who is on the Prowl for a New Photo Printing Company


Dear Wolfgang:

I'm sorry that you are having tummy issues but was it really necessary to pooh on the couch? At 3am?

Love,
The One Who Still Loves You Even Though You Are a Disgusting Pit of Germs

The Random Aspects Of Our Lives Come Together Once In A While

Google searches that have brought people to my blog recently:

is it normal for the baby to look like a monkey at 11 weeks?
Erm, I'm not really an expert on baby things, but I'd think that at 11 weeks it's normal for a fetus to look a bit monkey-like.

rosea vaseline
I do not recommend Vaseline. Calamine maybe but not Vaseline.

womanizer and proud
Congratulations.

please tie me up
Umm, no thank you?

worm wriggle stomach
I sincerely hope you are not talking about your own stomach. If so, you should get off the computer and get yourself to a doctor, pronto.

out of gas idiot
No, you're an out of gas idiot.

why are there two l's highlighted in pink
I have no idea.

dog pooh job for 9 and 12
I don't know what this "pooh job" that you speak of is and I'm not sure I want to know.

I don't care that you are crazy
Thank you!

There is a dog, he is completely black, he is standing in the middle of an intersection thats painted completely black as well. A car with broken headlights stops right before tting ther dog. How
I don't know how to respond to this. I've got nothing.

I Paid Twenty-five Cents To Light A Little White Candle

Lindsay tagged me for a meme a while back and then I got tagged for the Facebook 25 this morning. I've decided to combine the two. I'm lazy like that.

1. If I could figure out a way to bring Shawn and the puppies, I would move back to England in a heartbeat.

2. It is my dream to be a judge on Iron Chef America (for either Battle Bacon or Battle Chocolate.)

3. Rome is one of the most beautiful cities I visited while in Europe; I hope to make it back someday.

4. Spinach, beets, walnuts, and mangoes taste like dirt to me.

5. I love my camera. I try to use it every day. I’m hoping that if I take a million photos, I will magically become a fabulous photographer. So far it’s not working.

6. I was named after Sir Edmund Hillary.

7. I would rather read the book than see the movie.

8. I have always loved to cook. I didn’t go to culinary school because I was worried that if cooking was my job, I would hate it.

9. Odd numbers made me uncomfortable. The only exception is the number nine. Don’t ask me why.

10. I do not support the 2010 Vancouver Olympics.

11. I worry. All the time. About everything.

12. It is my New Years’ resolution to eat beets once a month in 2009. I have not broken this resolution yet even though I hate beets (see point 4.)

13. My puppies are both named after beer. I named Stella and she loves me best. Shawn named Wolfgang and he loves him best. The puppies are fickle, though, and their love can be easily bought with peanut butter treats.

14. I love seeing live music. My favourite concert was when I saw Willie Nelson with my dad.

15. I have a crippling fear of sharks and snakes. If I see either on tv, I cover my eyes. It’s not enough to just close my eyes; I have to cover them with my hands as well. There may be shrieking involved also.

16. I will not swim in the ocean because of sharks.

17. I will never go to Australia because of the trio of death: sharks, snakes and spiders. Australia can pretty much go to hell, as far as I’m concerned.

18. I really want to have laser eye surgery but I am afraid to smell my eyes burning. I actually went for a consultation and asked the doctor if I would be able to smell it. He said yes. I will not be having laser eye surgery any time soon.

19. My perfect Friday evening involves warm weather, a patio, my favourite people, cold gin, and nachos with extra guacamole.

20. I think that Nigella Lawson is the coolest tv chef. Rachel Ray is the most annoying (and she’s not even a real chef!)

21. It given a choice between cake and pie, I will choose pie every time. Especially if it’s key lime pie. The only exception would be if I was offered red velvet cake or pecan pie – I would choose the red velvet.

22. I want to have kids but not until I’m at least 30 years old. I feel like once I turn 30 I will magically turn into a grownup.

23. I have two tattoos. I want two more but after that I am stopping.

24. The sound of people cracking their knuckles makes me physically gag.

25. Dark chocolate-covered digestive biscuits make my life complete.

I'm not tagging anyone else because it's Monday and I make the rules on Monday.

There's A Haiku Poem Inside Of My Head

Hello lover, I
have missed you so. You are my
treasured day, Friday.

A whole week has passed
since I last saw you. I wish
I could make you stay.

Friday, why must you
tease me with inferior
days such as Thursday?

Let's not fight again,
Friday. I cannot bear it
when we are apart.

I love you, Friday.
I always have and always
will. You complete me.

I'd Like To Paint A Picture For You

Friday Faff: DIY Edition

I have finished my painting project!

I ended up painting the two main walls light green and the fireplace olive green. I'm really happy with the way it turned out. I love having colour on the walls but the green we chose is subtle enough to be considered neutral (which I don't care about right now but I might when we decide to sell. When we were condo-shopping, Shawn and I saw one place that had a navy blue bedroom and a dark maroon bedroom and another that had a mustard yellow / bright green colour scheme. We left both places immediately.)

Before:

After:

I've got a lot of the olive green paint left so I'm tempted to paint the bathroom but laziness is winning out at this point. Maybe I'll do it in a few months. Maybe not. Who knows?

Just Beat It Beat It Beat It Beat It No One Wants To Be Defeated - Take 2

The second month of my Eat Beats Once A Month For A Year resolution was marginally less painful than the first month.

I decided I would try borscht. I made this recipe (using vegetable stock instead of chicken.)

four medium-sized beets roasted with fresh thyme in a 400 degree oven for an hour, then peeled and roughly chopped

one large onion, two large carrots, fresh thyme, minced garlic and olive oil

vegetable stock added, simmered for about half an hour

thyme sprigs removed, soup & beets thrown in the blender

blended with 1 tablespoon honey & 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar

returned to the pot to heat through

garnished with sour cream, grated granny smith apple and chopped fresh dill

So borscht is less disgusting than the roasted beets we had last month but it is more disgusting than every other soup, ever. I do not think that I would ever choose borscht over any other soup, unless the other soup was ass soup. Ass soup is the only soup that makes borscht an appealing choice.

The problem with borscht is that there is leftovers. I actually ate borscht on two separate occasions (does that mean I can skip March?) before tapping out and taking the leftovers to my mom. Who is a weirdo and actually likes borscht.

Carbon's Anniversary The Parting Of The Sensory - 6

Dear Shawn,

Happy 6 Monthiversary!

January was a slow month. We're trying to save money so we've had many quiet nights in. I'm not complaining though - staying home instead of going out has resulted in me perfecting my chicken satay recipe. Wolfgang continues to pee on the floor instead of his puppy pad. Stella continues to be the cutest puppy in the world. I have almost finished painting the condo and you have added another(!) piece of equipment to your System. The last month has been quiet; I feel like I should be fretting more over us becoming old boring married folk. I'm not though, because it's been so much fun.

Here's to another six months.

Love,
Hillary

Eat 'Em Up L Chill

By now, I'm assuming everyone has seen the "Starting with the letter..." business but just in case, the rules are as follows:

If you want to participate, leave a comment on this post and I will assign you a letter. You then write about 10 things you love that begin with your assigned letter and post them on your blog. When people comment on your posted list, you give them a letter and the chain continues on and on.

Marie was kind enough to assign me the letter "L" (I was worried I would get Q or X.)
(all of my pictures are from photobucket)

1. London, England

I went to England when I was twenty-one and stayed for a year and a bit. I can't really describe my love for England, except to say that right away it felt like home and has continued to feel like my second home. Meeting fabulous people (hi peeps!) certainly helped but it was more than that. The food and language (I love British slang and try to incorporate it into my daily life, particularly when I'm driving) and architecture and music (I have quite the boner for British bands) and history (the pub I worked in was older than, um, Canada) all combined to create this lovely place that I felt (and still feel) a connection to. It was hard to leave England and every couple of months I try to convince Shawn that we should move there.



2. Lemons

I love the taste of lemons. I love lemon pie, lemon squares, lemon curd - if it's lemon, i will love it. I also love the scent of lemons. I'm not a big perfume person, but if I could find one that smelled like lemons? I'd be a very happy lady.



3. Limes

I love limes (I am pretty sure I will always be scurvy-free.) There is nothing better than a big slice of lime in a cold gin & tonic. Except, maybe, a slice of key lime pie.

4. Law & Order

I will always choose Special Victims Unit over the other two Law & Orders (because Elliott Stabler is my boyfriend) but I love them all. Shawn complains daily about the plethora of Law & Order reruns on the pvr. He doesn't understand why I need to watch ten-year old episodes. I don't understand how he can hate Law & Order.

5. Lipsmackers Dr. Pepper

I am not a fan of lipstick. It's a bit too fussy for daily use so I stick to lip gloss. The most low-maintenance being Lipsmackers Dr. Pepper (I do own grown-up lip glosses by Clinique and MAC and whatnot, but I like a lip gloss that I can apply without a mirror.) I don't like the drink Dr. Pepper but the Lipsmackers Dr. Pepper tastes like cherries. And it actually does have a bit of colour in it so I feel like I'm (sort of) wearing makeup.

6. LaMontagne, Ray

One of my favourite musicians of all-time. His lyrics are beautiful and his voice is so emotive.

7. Little Songs by David Usher

David Usher's first solo album. Contains two of my favourite songs "St. Lawrence River" and "Forestfire."



8. Lorelai Gilmore

Oh how I loved the Gilmore Girls. It is my goal to one day own the entire season on dvd so I can watch it from start to finish. It was a sad day when the show ended (and it wasn't helped by the fact that the finale was a bit meh.)



9. Linden, Trevor

My favourite Canuck player. He retired last year but I'm hoping to see him become part of the coaching staff.



10. Le Creuset

I don't actually own any Le Creuset cookware but when I am a Fancy Lady, my kitchen will be stocked. There something about the sturdy pieces in bold colours that really appeals to me.

Baby I Wanna Let My Hair Down

Dudes! Thanks for all the nice words on Friday's post! The dress and tights are both from JCrew. The large calf muscles are due to years of dance and baseball (the cute bum, rippled abs and toned back are all long gone but the huge calf muscles remain, dammit.) The hair ... well I wanted to give you guys a close-up, I really did. I didn't have my camera at work though and by the time I got home, the headband had been ditched and I was rocking a simple ponytail. I think I might have a large head to go along with my large calf muscles; headbands start to annoy me after about an hour. I will try to recreate the hair without a visual:

First I parted my hair on the side. I then put a headband on, making sure to lift the headband up and over the front of my hair so I didn't mess up the part. Then I gently shook my hair out, to get rid of the side-part behind the headband. I pulled my hair up into a loose ponytail but didn't pull my hair all the way through on the last loop, creating a loop of hair. I pushed two bobby pins up through the bottom of the loop of hair, pushing my hair up to create a ridge of hair up against the headband. The ridge sort of creates the illusion of volume without actually having to tease my hair or add hair product. Next time I do it to my hair I'll take a picture and post it here.

I don't have pictures of my hair but I do have pictures of my puppies:

the cuteness that is Stella

the face wrinkles kill me

"erm, please can you stop taking pictures and just let me sleep?"

Wolfgang: not the smartest puppy in the world but definitely one of the cutest