Tuesday, 28 September 2010

Autumn Leaves Have Faded Now That Smile I Lost Well I've Found Somehow

The autumn blues are not new to me. They are not unexpected or original or even interesting but here I am, wrapped up in my melancholy and raging against a season.

I'm struggling. I don't remember being this sad. It feels like I'm spending a lot of time and effort just to be myself. And still I'm failing. I wake up angry that my nose is cold but I refuse to shut the bedroom window at night. I try to measure my words but still they come out snappish and shrill. I cry. At everything.

I know it will pass. It always does. The days get shorter and the rain becomes more frequent but soon I'll be back to being me. October is hockey and my birthday and Thanksgiving and pumpkin pie. Until then, I've got this cuddle bug reminding me to smile.

video

15 comments:

  1. Oh, I can't see the picture but I imagine it is all sorts of adorable. Keep your chin up, and know we care about you and hope VERY much that things start picking up soon. Until then, grab a pumpkin latte, take pictures of beautiful reds and oranges, and enjoy those snuggles <3

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  2. I know people don't like hearing (or in this case reading) this, but maybe talk to a therapist? Sometimes it helps to talk to a stranger (qualified one) that can help you sort through things.

    But if you don't want to go that route, know that I'm here for you if you need to chat/email.

    Big hugs and hope those blues go away soon.

    Oh and p.s. Stella is so adorable in that video. :)

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  3. Pumpkin pie makes everything better. Big hugs, lady!

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  4. Have Shawn take you apple picking! Nothing makes you feel all warm and fuzzy like warm mulled cider and apple cider donuts!

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  5. I can definitely understand how you're feeling. The last few weeks have been difficult for me too, due to the crummy weather. But at least it looks like the rest of the week is going to be gorgeous! Hooray! And that is such a super cute video. Love it!

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  6. Awww - the autumn blues are no fun. But October is right around the corner! I hope you feel better soon.

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  7. As you said, it will pass, but it is never easy. I hope that it passes faster than usual for you this year! Best wishes.

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  8. Dogs make everything a tad bit more bearable. Sorry to hear you've got the blues ... wish I could do something to help.

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  9. I can definitely relate, hunny bunny. Hugs to you.

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  10. If the sun weren't shining right now, I'd be a blubbering mess (PMS + SAD = WEEPY). Well, I'm still weepy, but coping.

    All that to say is that I get this, and I'm sorry you're struggling.

    Love you, lady.

    xoxo

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  11. I am not certain that we have an autumn in Florida. Although, I think I remember kind of liking autumn, I'm not entirely sure. I hope you feel better soon.

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  12. oh dear, stella pawing at your hand to make you keep scratching her face is TOO MUCH. hee :)

    i second the mulled cider recommendation. it makes the house smell delicious, and you're basically FORCED to curl up on the couch and brood while you're drinking it anyway...

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  13. Looks like a fairly persistant girl, what happens if you stop before she's ready?

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  14. I'm so sorry. My husband has severe SAD, and it's really hard to deal with. Have you tried a SAD lamp? Or increasing your vitamin D? We've found both of those things to be hugely helpful.

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