Monday, 31 October 2011

No I Don't Want To Have To Be The One Who Has To Lose You

My grandma turned 95 last January and shortly after her birthday, she had a stroke. I wanted her to hold on to meet my baby and she did. She fought. She held my baby many times and near the end, when she was confined to her bed and she barely had the strength to stay awake, he gripped her finger and gave her a wide, gummy grin. I couldn't ask for anything more. I couldn't wish for her to get better.

She gave me her pumpkin pie recipe and her snappy tongue. I have her love of dogs and her wonky thyroid. I use Ivory soap because of her. Shortbread cookies covered in red and green sugar will always take me back to her kitchen.

My grandma was not an affectionate lady. She didn't call us "sweetie" or bestow us with kisses or cuddles. I never once heard her say "I love you" to anyone - ever - but I never doubted that she loved us all, fiercely. She was strong. The strongest lady I've ever known. I hope she gave me even just an ounce of her strength.

Posted by at

12 comments:

  1. Angella1 November 2011 at 06:26

    Beautiful tribute, Hills. Big hugs. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  2. Marie1 November 2011 at 06:55

    Wonderful post. So sorry about your grandma hon. :( But so very glad she got to meet the little one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Stephanie1 November 2011 at 06:56

    How wonderful that she hung on long enough to meet the little one! I'm sorry to hear that she's passed, but it sounds like her memory is far from gone!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Britt1 November 2011 at 07:10

    <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. Alice1 November 2011 at 14:16

    it's so special that you were able to give her that time with her great-grandson. hugs, hugs, hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Mermanda1 November 2011 at 18:24

    Sorry for your loss, my dear. <3

    ReplyDelete
  7. Amber1 November 2011 at 21:40

    Thinking of you friend. I'm so glad she was able to meet Grady. You will treasure those photos forever!

    ReplyDelete
  8. addy2 November 2011 at 15:27

    What a perfect post. I'm glad that she got to meet her great-grandson. So sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sizzle4 November 2011 at 07:44

    What a beautiful tribute. It's so special that she got to meet Grady. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lemon Gloria5 November 2011 at 08:52

    Oh, Hillary, this made me cry. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Lauren5 November 2011 at 19:57

    This post is beautiful. I'm so sorry for your loss, and hope that you are okay.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous10 November 2011 at 12:22

    I'm so glad she got to meet Grady :) The photo of him passed out in her arms is priceless.
    So sorry for your loss, lady. xo

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)